Sunday, September 16, 2007

And it continues...

The last 72 hours of my life...conversations that leave my heart buzzing and consumed with purpose. I HAVE A PURPOSE! How is it that in one moment I am down with dispair and hopelessness and then with a small cry for help, God comes and overwhelms me with interactions of love and purpose. It began Friday night at a Keith Urban concert. I stood there and watched my friend Janessa experience her first concert. We felt alive as we danced, screamed, and laughed. The struggles of life were left at the door and we enjoyed every moment of the night. It continued the next morning as I had coffee with an old friend in my hometown. Time past quickly as we exposed the depths of our hearts in that moment. Thoughts of renewal and being reconciled to God were shared and what it takes to walk away from the things that try to pull us back in to a lifestyle away from what we were originally created for. It continued as I stopped by my brother Brandon's house to welcome him and my new sister in law back from their honeymoon. Again, conversations of depth and feeling my heart expressed into words...such a great feeling! I felt an awareness and appreciation for the friendship that is beginning to grow between family and myslef. I was overwhelmed by the concept of family and no matter how dysfunctional you think your family is, God still makes it functional. What a concept! It continued as I re-united with a friend that has been abroad for the last year in Africa and then Australia. Meag you are beautiful my friend! Meag...a woman of no compromise. Wanting and willing to do what her Creator desires for her life. Even if that means walking away from your deepest dreams and desires. I sat there absorbed by the words of encouragement that came from her mouth and ultimately her heart. I learned life changing lessons within the hour and can confidently say that I am changed from that interaction. It continued as I drove away from Portland back to Tacoma, the place I now call home. As I sang my guts out in the car, I again was overwhelmed by how God was showing himself to me. I have a feeling that He is always showing himself to me but my clumsy eyes fail to see Him. But by His grace, He awakens me to experience this. I drove for 2.5 hours in a state of gratitude and awe. So this is what it feels like to have purpose. And it continues my friends...I am trying to absorb it all. From the connection He allows me to have with my boyfriend in a random cafe, to the stranger, Sam, that I met at the park. Every interaction has a purpose and I don't want to miss it. So here is a challenge, an encouragement, to cry out to God and ask for help in seeing Him around you. I dare you...

1 comment:

J May said...

You're on, girl! I love that challenge! What an encouraging report of God's in-breaking of His love and meaning! I have been encouraged seeing Him do that in my life a little bit as well. So cool to see what He is doing for oyu my friend. I enjoyed Chillin' and reading with you and James on Sunday. That was one of my fave parts of the weekend. I was just thinking about that this morning! Thanks to God for overwhelimg you with love and purpose.

P.S. I think I noticed something in midst of what you were writing. Was the main means that God used to bring that hope to you your connections with people and Himself? Was it really that simple? Oh man, if that's true God is stinkin' smart. I've been more and more thinking about meaning being tied to relationship and am encouraged when I see that at work because the implications seem to be that seeking His Kingdom before worrying about money and looks has something to do with meaningful relationships. I dunno, but it seems really cool... and ridiculously obvoious. Humans are weird.

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"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."

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