Tuesday, December 29, 2009

You'll Like Tacoma

Yesterday, I fell back in love with the city of Tacoma.

clear.crisp.peeps.sites.
Not all who wander are lost...I wandered for hours.
watching...waiting...listening...
snap.shot.delight





Next generation of photographers...

Like what you see...more photos on my Travel Blog Site

Monday, December 28, 2009

There Is So Much More

When I heard the news,
my heart fell on the floor.
I was on a plane on my way to Baltimore.
In these troubled times it's hard enough as it is.
My soul has a known a better life than this.

I wonder how so many can be in so much pain,
while others don't seem to feel a thing.
Then I curse my whiteness
and I get so damn depressed.
In a world of suffering,
why should I be so blessed?

I heard about a women who lives in Colorado.
She built a monument of sorts behind the garage door,
where everyday she prays for all whom are born
and all whose souls have passed on.
Sometimes my troubles get so thick,
I can't see how I'm gonna get through it.
But, then I'd rather be stuck up in a tree
then be tied to it.

There is so much more.

I don't feel comfortable with the way my clothes fit.
I cant get used to my bodies limits.
I got some fancy shoes to try and kick away these blues.
They cost a lot of money but they aren't worth a thing.
I wanna free my feet from the broken glass and concrete.
I need to get out of this city.
Lay upon the ground stare a hole in the sky,
wondering where I go when I die.
...When I die.

~Brett Dennen

Friday, December 25, 2009

a good word from Meister Eckhart

God is being beyond being and a
nothingness beyond being.

The most beautiful thing
which a person can say about God
would be for that person to remain silent
from the wisdom of an inner weatlh.

So,
be silent
and quit flapping your gums about God.

~Meister Eckhart

Monday, December 21, 2009

express your face...

Expression.Faces.Release.Unity.Friends.Connection.



fetal position




The holiday season has been difficult for me the last few years. It all started when I experienced the taste of greed even amongst the poorest of families in the community I live in. One experience in particular really got my wheel turning in wondering what are the true needs of a human being? I am convinced that basic necessities in the United States have a completely different meaning than for those that don't even own a pair of shoes. I am convinced that consumerism has robbed me from understanding the joy of giving. I am tired of feeling confused, frustrated, cynical, bitter towards what an average American (including myself) feels compelled to consume during this time of year. I am searching for momentum to take me from the ritual of spending to one that values time spent with the people we are surrounded with. A video that has helped me put words to this frustration and allowed me to see the big picture is The Story of Stuff If you haven't watched this...please take the time to do so. It is worth it!


Things that have kept me sane:
patient husband
prayer
bon iver
reading three cups of tea
eating chocolate

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Not Everyone Likes Santa...

Nativity Play Tradition

For the last 4 years I have attempted to revisit a tradition within my family of when we were kids...putting towels on our heads and performing the birth of Jesus narrative. Though my three older brothers and I are now grown adults, I have found new participants with the youth my husband works with at the Tacoma Rescue Mission. With the help of volunteers, we dress these kiddos up to experience what it may have been like to be a shepherd or travel many miles on a donkey. It also seems to be an opportunity to talk about why this story may be so special and significant. We will be performing on Friday...so far we have been practicing with 8 girls...not sure how the whole Joseph thing is going to work but I am sure we will make due! I am grateful for this break and to be able to hang out with these incredible kids that have difficult stories themselves, yet still smile and give the best hugs!
This is my brothers and I back in the day...
Last year's shepherds
Last year's Mary

Monday, November 9, 2009

a story about a family

I wanted to post this story...a redemptive story! This family of 9 has faced incredible storms and still have smiles of hope to show. I was fortunate to shoot Tony and Lou Ann's wedding and capture what a beautiful family God intentionally has a hand in. Below is a link where Tony and Lou Ann share personally a part of their story. I hope this story stirs emotions of compassion, hope, and love for you.

TRM link to Lou Ann and Tony's story



Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. ~Jane Howard



sicky sick...surrendering to rest

October and November have not been the best months for me this year. It is unfortunate because I really do enjoy the crisp and beautiful NW fall. About 3 weeks ago I was bedridden for at least 6 days to apparently what everyone is calling N1H1. Now, three weeks later, I find myself in the same position with a sore throat, congestion, and headache. What is the deal? Now I am not trying to be a big baby that complains all the time but I have to be honest about how inconvenient this has been. If Grad School was a walk in the park, relationships naturally initiated, and I had a magic maid to cook and clean...well then I wouldn't be so unhappy! Besides, laying in bed alone gets kind of old after awhile. I caught up on the latest television shows (thanks to hulu.com), made a dent on my side of the bed, and have had lots of zzzzz. It is interesting how I think I have control over how I spend my time, my health, etc. And then it is taken over night and I am left with surrendering to rest. If I am to learn anything from these experiences of illness (besides the latest t.v. gossip), I am learning to not take things for granted. I have been overwhelmed with the responses of others. My professors, friends & family (FB prayers), and of course my caretaker-husband. There comes a time when we need to recognize that slowing down is not such a bad thing-even if it means being bedridden. Momentum is an interesting thing...and what it takes to get us to change directions. Though it has been a tough last 30 days healthwise...I have learned a new meaning of gratitude and rest.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Words and Forms of Prayer


I am currently taking a 2 day prayer module class at my school (www.mhgs.edu). I am still in the midst of reflecting on what the last 24 hours has revealed in me. I am grateful for this classes' timing, despite the papers that need to be written, articles/books that beckon my eyes, or the the friends and family that deserve my attention. This open conversation of how we communicate with God (both speaking and listening) has encouraged me to think outside the box and step out in faith. Siah תלונה is the Hebrew word for complaint. I have been reading Psalms and how the words of lament are so near to my heart. So many times we approach God with a complaint and quickly attempt to resolve the chaos. I want to be authentic with God and be with him in it all - the mixed responses of numbness, anxiety, joy, suffering, pride, wondering, loneliness...sometimes we pray and have no words. Have you ever thought that a grunt, groan, or moan as a form of prayer? Psalm 77:3 "I remember you, O God, and I groaned; I mused, and my spirit inquired." Yesterday's class we were encouraged to write our own Psalm, to express our heart in regards to a situation or frustration in our life. I thought I would share what I was compelled to write:
My God, my God. My heart is a raging sea. Why do you allow the suffering? Where are you interceeding on the behalf of the abused, the drug addicted, the helpless? I am full of rage at why your people continue to choose war. Where are you God? Why does it seem so helpless when I walk by and see your people consumed with hurt and suffering?

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Mt Adams climb











14 hours. sunrise. head lamps. good conversations. lots of snacks. amazing views. fresh air. sore muscles. Mt Adams got the best of us!! Enjoy the pics

wrestling with desire

I can't help but recognize this wrestle within me towards desire. There is a risk and perhaps a cost when we choose to desire and are left with the possibility of being unmet. Even with the little things, like asking a friend for support or wanting the bus to be on time. It seems small and quickly fading but I am aware of this small part of me that dies when my desires are not met. It makes it a little more difficult the next time around to have an expectation or desire for a certain thing to occur. And then there are the larger parts of me that desire to be known, to love, and be loved. My heart seems fragile and easily wounded when I can't seem to get beyond my unmet need or my unmet desire. This all feels confusing and yet I long to engage with desire so that it does not get the best of me...to continue hoping for more despite setbacks.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Who is your King?

I have seen this once before but today it absorbed in a way that was new and inspiring. I love that Dr. Shadrach Meshach describes Jesus in so many ways and yet He is "undescribable." Who is your king and does he/she save you in the end? There are so many things in our life that we place as king- ourself, money, power, possession, food, sex, etc. Do those things save us in the end?

Saturday, September 19, 2009

First signs of Fall

The change from Summer to Fall always seems to surprise me. Maybe it is the ambivalence I tend to have about change. The Fall is a season of death and beauty...as the leaves slowly turn and then fall to the ground. The lighter side of me remembers the smell of pumpkin spice lattes, crisp apples, and of course wearing warm cozy sweaters. I am looking forward to capturing the colors of Fall this year in hopes of an expression of this quandary!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

gratitude and Mars Hill Graduate School

For those of you who may not know, I am in my second year studying Counseling Psychology at Mars Hill Graduate School. In about the last 5 minutes something struck me and I must reflect about what I am feeling. GRATITUDE might be the word to describe what is bursting from my bleeding heart. I knew that this experience would be one of growth but never would I find myself deeply acknowledging that this experience has and is changing my life. If you believe that the gospel can change the world...if you are willing to see beauty within darkness...or recently I would put it as seeing beauty within immorality, then I would check out this school (http://mhgs.edu/). More reflection to come...


picture from www.patricklovephotography.com

Monday, September 14, 2009

Will, Roxanna, & Isaac

One thing I love about taking photos is the possibility of capturing our humanness and capacity to love! William, Roxanna, and Isaac are a loving family. We had fun taking pictures so that they could send some photos to family in El Salvador. To be honest, I was a little nervous about the language barrier and potentially some cultural differences (in asking them to pose in certain ways). Capturing pictures of family members that naturally reflect love makes it easy! Enjoy





Friday, September 11, 2009

mo theaghlach (my family)

Here are a few faces that I think about often!
As you can see...I have many brothers and and most of my pictures include a little one :)

Palmer (my nephew)Watson (my dad)

Andy (my bro)

Bryson (my bro)

Lisa (my mom and the proud grandma of Palmer)

Dennis (my great uncle)

Alexis (my niece) and Jay (my father in law and proud boppa of Alexis)

Tenile (my sister in law and proud mommy of Palmer)

Brian (my brother in law and proud dad of Alexis)

Sally (my mother in law) and Patrick (my brother in law). Skype is a frequent communication with Pat as he lives in Venezuela

Angela (my sister in law and proud mom of Alexis)

Brandon (my bro and proud dad of Palmer)

Alexis (my niece)

Mt St Helens Adventure

A new annual tradition has begun with some of my college girlfriends. We kicked off the first year in the Mt. St. Helens Wildreness area. June Lake was a great place to backpack and camp. From there the hiking is incredible and fairly easy. Although, I would recommend good shoes as there are big rocks and bolders to scramble over as part of the hiking trails. My time around Mt. Helens was reflective of the cycle of death and life...as this volcanoe destroyed everything around it over 27 years ago and yet finds a way for new growth and beauty. Beauty for ashes may be another way of putting it (Isaiah 61:3)!! We had a great time and I believe the pictures may let you a little in on our experience :) Oh yea, watch out for sasquatch in these woods!! You may never know...










About This Blog

A place for...
Reflection Expression Invitation Creativity Inspiration Connection

"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."

~Henri Nouwen